Most of my life, I have been gripped by the question of who I am and how I fit into the world. This is a fundamental question that most people never even ask, let alone get right.
I was a very late bloomer. A scrawny, self-conscious teenager who could no longer compete in sports. Instead I took more of a background role. I was obsessed with why people did what they did. I focused on the possibility of what life could be like for myself and those around me rather than what it was currently like. I became a dreamer.
I knew what kind of person I wanted to be, however I had no idea how that translated into a career. After High School, most of my friends seemed to know what they wanted to do. I had no plans. I would go on to spend the next decade experiencing as much as possible and figuring out how the world actually works before drawing any conclusions about how I fit into it.
I studied Civil Engineering at University. I graduated 4 years later and after countless failed interviews, I relocated across the UK in order to take up a job with a big American company. I dedicated myself to the work, however things quickly got frustrating. I moved around the company (and the country) several times in order to find useful projects to work on. However, after 2 years I was deeply depressed. It got to the point where one weekend I just felt completely numb. By Monday morning, couldn't face going in to my office in London like I was supposed to, so instead I got the 11am train back to my hometown in South Wales. By this point I was beginning to realise (out of severe frustration and emotional pain) who I was and what my strengths were. The path I was on was out of line with that, so I took what I had learnt and moved on.
At age 27, after an inspiring trip around North America (including some deep conversations with a close friend of mine and an airbnb host), I decided I wanted to enter the tech sphere and learn sales, so I got myself a sales job for a tech startup in London. I knocked on the door and spoke to the CEO. The next day I was hired. A year later, I became the top salesman in the company. This was partly down to the fact that I worked alongside a guy called Neil, who was 10 years older than myself. He mentored me.
The following year, Neil started his own company and hired me to help him build it, which we have successfully done. Fast forward to 2020 and I have my own coaching practice.
Quitting my engineering career was the best decision I have ever made, however it was also the hardest (which is often the case). But this hardship taught me the most valuable lesson I have ever learnt...
Everyone has a vision of who they want to be - but hardly anyone is actually doing it. Most people don't think for themselves. Most people don't have their own standards. Most people don't follow their own version of a good life.
The truth is; no one cares about your progression as much as you do. It’s good to seek advice from people, but only if those people have your best interests in mind.
There have been times in my life where I have been lost, discouraged and stagnant. I have felt alone. I have had sleepless, tormenting nights and exhausting, procrastination-filled days. However, in some of those moments I have found someone who changed my perspective, picked me up, pushed me forward and allowed me to punch through the wall. Some of these people were in my life consistently, others just momentarily, however they all helped transform me.
I grew up in rural Wales and I now live in Urban London. I've worked in bars, hotels, construction, engineering, finance, sales, data science and AI. I've grinded away in global corporate office jobs and I've hustled my way in early-stage tech startups. I'm a football player turned snowboard instructor turned Jiu Jitsu competitor. I've picked up life-long relationships at every stage of my life and I've also felt the brunt of disloyal ones.
Nowadays, I have a circle of people around me who keep me on-track. I do the same for them. Why? Because this is the kind of world I want to live in.
Here’s the thing…
How many of us have people around us who want us to succeed? How many of us band together with others to create an extraordinary life? Who picks us up when we fall off track and pushes us when we get too comfortable? Who gives us the honest, unbiased truth, even if it hurts to hear it?
"When left to their own devices, people show the usual catalogue of errors, laziness and reliance on gut feelings...But when people know in advance that they will have to explain themselves, they think more systematically and self-critically."
Jonathan Heidt - Leading Social Psychologist
I am now on a mission to help other young, inspired adults find their path and excel on their path in today's world.
I realised early on that the hardest part of forging your own path and building a good life for yourself is trying to build it alone.
You want to reach a point where life is no longer happening to you, it’s happening for you. You’re not coping, you’re thriving. You have mental clarity. You’re firing on all cylinders. you're connecting with people on a higher level and lifting those around you. Anyone can have this, so long as they want it badly enough...